• 1. How to Become a Virgin 0:50
• 2. The Half-Eaten Sausage Would Like to See You in His Office 0:50
• 3. Kill Roger Hedgecock 0:48
• 4. Straight From The Horse's Mouth 1:12
• 5. Moth-Eaten Deer Head 0:00
• 6. priest with the sexually-transmitted diseases, get out of my bed 0:32
• 7. Cattle Mutilation 0:27
• 8. Perils of Believing in Round Squares 0:58
• 9. Twenty-Three Lubed-Up Schizophrenics With Delusions of Grandeur 0:00
• 10. Stucco Obelisks Labeled as Trees 0:52
• 11. Skin Graft at Seventy-five Miles an Hour 0:38
• 12. Get Off the Cross, the Wood Is Needed 0:00
• 13. Who Wants A Dose Of The Clap? 0:54
• 14. Wet Nurse Syndrome Hand-Me-Down Display Case 0:37
• 15. Gluing Carpet to Your Genitals Does Not Make You a Cantaloupe 0:51
• 16. Twenty-Three Full-Time Cowboys 1:06

Tracklisting from Last.fm